Tag Archives: healing; self help; love; confidence; self esteem; self respect; empowerment; strength;

BOOK RECOMMENDATION: The Courage To Be Yourself by Sue Patton Thoele


Written by Sue Patton Thoele

To Purchase: CLICK HERE

I highly recommend this book titled “The Courage to Be Yourself-A Woman’s Guide to Emotional Strength and Self Esteem.”  This book actually caught me off guard because it covered topics outside of the conventional “self help” topics I’ve read about. It descriptively breaks down the women’s issues that invade us everyday – Topics range from friendship, to facing fears, expectations, limits and boundaries, appeasing, emotional wisdom, courage, abuse, inner strength, praying, love, the power of thought  and the list goes on.  Certainly this book helped me to reflect on some of my actions and how they effect relationships (friendships, family, business etc.) both positively and negatively. It allowed for me to think more objectively about my life, my decisions and how/what/where my views and position stand as a woman.  I’ve recently endured a rather painful situation in my life and read the below excerpt that spoke to me and helped me think differently about the way I handled it internally

Resistance Magnifies Pain
“Natural childbirth classes teach mothers-to-be that the pain of childbirth is greater when you resist it and grow tense with fear.  They tell you to “breathe into the pain,” not because deep breathing decreases the pain, but because relaxation increases your ability to accept pain….I encourage them to turn toward it, relax into the experience of pain, give themselves permission to feel it and act on it.  This frequently amazes them because most have been taught the sitff-upper lip appraoch to both physical and emotional pain. Resistance magnifies pain.  The more we resist difficult people, concepts, or circumstances, the more we draw to us exactly what we’re trying to resist… Resistance causes tension.  Tension creates tightness, stiffness, and inflexibility…..”   Often times, friends/peers/loved one have the best intentions and give the advice to ” don’t cry”  “don’t be angry” …but dammit sometimes it’s part of the process of working through one’s pain. LOL. I’ve crossed paths with individuals who hold everything in, and they’ve shared how it’s inhibited their current/future relationships, caused serious health issues or worse.  Just remember to BREATHE!



“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, my friend, anyone can start from now and make a brand new end.” -Anonymous

I’ve been inspired to share things, events, stories, music and/or ANYTHING that exemplifies hope, empowerment,  healing, compassion, love, forgiveness, laughter, patience, growth, self reflection and/or ANY and ALL things that support change, growth, healing, love and becoming the best person we/I/she/her inspires to be.  Over the last five years I’ve endured a tremendous amount of love in my life, tons of laughter, good health, amazing memories with friends and loved ones, achieved more than I’ve ever expected, developed amazing friendships and have been graced by god with the most amazingly supportive friends and family an individual could ask for.

Alongside these priceless experiences I’ve also endured some not so fun emotions such as betrayal, fear, hurt and resentment. I’ve experienced more deaths this year than any other; this year I felt a hurt so deep that it’s difficult for me to explain the level of disappointment, pain and disregard I felt. When life confronts us with challenges it’s important to look inward.  Sometimes looking inward is humbling + scary + a little too honest, but later extremely gratifying to the mind, body, spirit and relationships that surround us.  I’ve called on “love, compassion, forgiveness and understanding” to give me the strength to handle some of these circumstances. Love yourself! No one will love you more than yourself. Sometimes we get so caught up with taking care of everyone else, running errands, appearing family/friends/boyfriends/girlfriends that it’s almost uncomfortable to focus on number one! ME!  As my favorite comedian, Kat Williams once said:


Very soon after the conclusion of these experiences did I realize that I’m not alone. Sometimes in the midst of chaos we can forget about our personal power, and often times it may only take something small to remind us of our personal truths and call attention to our belief in ourself. I’m comfortable with saying that I know that I want to make something positive out of what I’ve went through and I’m healing.  It’s a process but it’s happening exactly the way it’s supposed too.  I don’t believe that it’s healthy nor helpful for a person to withhold resentments, bitterness, anger etc. in their hearts.  Do yourself a favor and really dig deep into areas to truly heal.  There is no time  restrictions or rules.  Things that have been not handled will ALWAYS show up later in life.  It’s worth it!  I can only speak for myself when I say this.  I can’t ignore the horrible way some of these things have made me feel; however I’m choosing to handle it and use the LOVE to get through it all.

“whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

Who came up with this quote?   I think we’ve all had moments where we thought this quote was a bunch of bullshit…but it’s true! Everyday that passes I realize something new about myself and a wise woman told me “Shelley don’t look at this like a treacherous journey…look at this as a wonderful journey in getting to know yourself.”  I realize that we never stop learning about ourselves.  I’ve been given the eye sight to examine a person’s character, make better decisions, choose differently and the gift of “time” to self reflect; learn from my mistakes and to reach my highest potential. 🙂 There is nothing greater than giving ourself the gift to really “LIVE” our lives-free of things that keep us from being who we truly are. We are all creatures of nature and we will continue to grow and learn even in the latter parts of our lives.  I work from the heart and I’m using this platform to share stories, resources and highlight some of the most amazing individuals I know and love.  Please feel free to share your stories and resources if you feel inspired!